Not everything in your career will go your way.
You may miss targets. Your best co-workers may sail off into the sunset for a new opportunity, leaving you feeling abandoned and picking up their workload until new staff are trained. You may make a flub in a conversation with a major donor that rattles around in your head for weeks.
These things happen. When they do, doubt easily seeps in.
Am I in the right profession? Am I good enough? Why do others seem to have an easy time attaining wins while I fight tooth and nail for mine?
An Enemy of Our Own CreationIt is normal to question your skills and abilities. Think back on the times you did.
They likely didn’t happen after securing a record-breaking gift or surpassing your gala’s financial goal.
Doubt rears its confidence-stealing head when you are faced with a failure (or what you perceive to be a failure). Doubt is so powerful it can easily begin turning the wheels of anxiety. Before you know it, you’re trapped in a negative feedback loop where every error is magnified and you’re chalking past successes up to luck, not to your exceptional work ethic.
Next time you make a gaff or a project takes an unexpected turn for the worse, you can’t let it consume you. Your game is too solid to be knocked off course by one crummy event.
Let’s look at some tips to build up your confidence after a setback.
Rearview MirrorWhen upheaval walks through the door, ask yourself, “Will I still be upset about this six months from now? Three years from now?”
The answer is usually, “No.”
Bad situations feel all-consuming when we’re actively navigating them. Afterwards, we gain perspective and insight we can apply to our careers.
Think back to an issue you faced early in your development career. It probably seemed monumental. Now you’re barely able to recall it.
The farther an incident is in the rearview mirror, the more we’ve learned from it and moved on.
Who Told You That?Everyone knows about an error I made.
All my co-workers think I’m not good in my role.
My boss is unhappy with my work.
When thoughts like these cycle through our racing minds, we begin to descend into a deep pit. Our confidence erodes at an alarming rate.
But often these “beliefs” are held by us alone. Next time you feel a negative statement bubbling up, ask yourself, “Who told you that?”
Usually, the answer is you and you alone. Don’t invent beliefs others have about you. Believe what they say and how they interact.
A garble of negative self-talk racing through your mind never gets you anywhere worth going.
The Grass is Always GreenerWe all know that social media has the power to negatively impact our self-image.
If your LinkedIn feed is a parade of others touting how amazing their workplace is, how they closed multi-million gifts, how their conference submission was accepted, and other high-flying achievements, it’s time to pause.
People are quick to shine a spotlight on their victories. Very few grab the virtual megaphone to shout about their stumbling blocks.
I can guarantee you that the folks espousing their achievements have faced their share of professional hiccups, too.
Don’t get drawn into comparing yourself to other fundraising professionals, especially when you know you only have half the picture.
Speak to a Seasoned ProfessionalIf your doubt and negative self-talk are at a fever pitch, chat to a senior development professional on your team or at a prior employer. Most likely, anyone with 25 years in fundraising under their belt has faced, and pushed through, career adversity.
They can share how they found a ladder in the trenches. Lean on the advice of others who have been where you are.
Tomorrow is a New DaySally Krawcheck, proclaimed to be one of the most powerful women on Wall Street, wisely said, “If you’re not making some notable mistakes along the way, you’re certainly not taking enough business and career chances.”
Don’t let yesterday’s failures consume you. You’re in this for the long haul, where some bumps in the road are to be expected.
Focus on the future. Reflect on your professional accomplishments that will serve you well as you go onwards and upwards.
Do you have a coping mechanism or tip you use when doubt creeps in? Tell us in the comments so others in the community can benefit from your wisdom.