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Fundraising Through Friction: 7 Tips From a Consultant to Manage Difficult Clients

By Amie Bossi posted 01-16-2024 09:00


As a fundraising consultant, I can say most clients are a joy to work with. 

However, the occasional "challenging" one is inevitable. These interactions, though stressful, can be navigated with grace and tact, ultimately strengthening my professional skills and client relationships.

While every client is different and requires a unique approach, I find these general guidelines to be effective:

1.     Identify the True Source of Conflict

Before diving into solutions, understand the source of the difficulty. Is the client expressing/displaying:

  • Misaligned expectations:
    Constant calls, unrealistic deadlines, and a refusal to acknowledge project limitations.

  • Micromanagement and lack of trust:
    Second-guessing decisions, over-scrutinizing reports, and needing to control every aspect of the campaign.

  • Poor communication:
    Missed meetings, ignored emails, and a lack of transparency about goals and priorities, withholding information or failing to provide timely feedback, and delaying the project.

  • Negativity and pessimism:
    Constant criticism, focusing on problems rather than solutions, unwillingness to collaborate, prone to outbursts or negativity, and creating a tense and unproductive environment.

  • Scope creep:
    Asking for additional services beyond the agreed-upon scope, impacting workload and fees.

Identifying the specific behavior helps you tailor your approach and choose the most effective interventions.

2.     Frequent Communication

Schedule weekly meetings to address concerns, set clear expectations, and establish boundaries.

I set a meeting cadence at the start of every project. I always have a meeting agenda and minutes from each meeting. Be sure to document everything.

Actively listen to the client's frustrations, validate their concerns, and strive for mutual understanding.

Use "I" statements to express your perspective without getting defensive. For example, "I understand your urgency. I'm committed to delivering the best possible results. However, the current deadline may require prioritizing certain tasks."

3.     Setting Boundaries

While being accommodating is essential, don't sacrifice your well-being or professional standards:

  • Clearly define the scope of your work.
  • Outline deliverables and fees.
  • Stick to agreed-upon timelines.
  • Communicate any potential delays promptly.
  • Politely say "no" to unreasonable requests, explaining why they fall outside your scope.

Proactive boundary setting ensures you maintain a healthy workflow and prevents resentment down the line.

4.     Keeping Expectations in Check

Unrealistic expectations often lead to disappointment and friction. During the initial project scope discussions, be candid about potential challenges and timelines.

Explain the iterative nature of fundraising while emphasizing the importance of data-driven decisions over impulsive actions. Regularly share progress updates and present realistic scenarios, adjusting expectations along the way.

Transparency fosters trust and prevents sudden shockwaves when results inevitably differ from idealized projections.

5.     De-Escalating Tensions

Dealing with emotional clients can be draining.

When faced with outbursts or negativity, take a deep breath and stay calm. Acknowledge their emotions without taking them personally.

Use active listening and reflective statements to show you understand their frustrations. For example, "It sounds like you're feeling frustrated with the current pace. Can you tell me more about what's got you concerned?"

Offering solutions or alternative approaches can shift the focus away from negativity and towards productive outcomes.

6.     Seeking Support

Sometimes, even the best efforts may not resolve the situation. Don't hesitate to seek advice and support from peers, mentors, or even your network of fellow CFREs.

They can offer valuable perspectives and suggest alternative strategies. If the situation becomes untenable, consider engaging in mediation or even terminating the contract, prioritizing your well-being and professional integrity.

Lean into the fact that some relationships just do not work out! And that is ok.

7.     Transforming Obstacles Into Opportunities

While challenging clients can be unpleasant, they can also present valuable learning opportunities.

They can help you hone your communication, negotiation, and conflict-resolution skills. Successfully navigating delicate interactions strengthens your resilience and adaptability, making you a more seasoned and well-rounded consultant.

Moreover, overcoming client challenges often leads to deeper trust and stronger relationships in the long run.

Remember, managing tricky clients is not about winning arguments or proving who's right.

It's about navigating situations with professionalism, empathy, and a commitment to achieving the best possible results for your client and your fundraising project.

By adopting these strategies and maintaining a positive mindset, you can transform frustrations into valuable learning experiences and enhance your success as a consultant in the ever-evolving world of fundraising.

A difficult client is not a reflection of your skills, but rather an opportunity for growth.